I know it's been awhile since I've written and I know this review is long overdue (been binging on shows I missed to see what to add to the list) so let's not waste anytime and let's get right down to it.
I've said it before and people have said as well. Why are their stories so drastically different especially when it comes to the important moments? Yes, I know people exaggerate and stories are seen and told differently for each person even if the event is the same, but seriously sometimes they are just totally out of sync I wonder if one of them was high and that's why they couldn't get the details of even the place correct. I mean seriously, how do you not know if Noah was beating up Scotty or not? Or even if one of them wanted to cover up that fact, why is the mother-in-law in one but not the other. This was my general complain for the season, I have a few more.
OMG, the worst character I thought was going to be Martin since the first time we meet him he faked a hanging. Seriously, who does that? But no he was not the worse, for someone passed him a long, long time ago in the season. Her name is Whitney. I don't how anyone can like Whitney. To me she is annoying as fuck. It wasn't the pregnancy, nor the abortion that bugged me. It was the fact that she said she loved him. Ugh, I wanted to throw her over the lighthouse when she said it and the fact that we all know Scotty doesn't give a shit just makes me want to smack her back into reality. I couldn't believe she went over to the Lockharts house. What was she planning to do over there? Become Scotty's wife? I thought I saw hope in her character when she asked Noah about her being a bad person. She isn't bad people, she's just stupid. I hope for next season she's the murder victim and anyone could be the killer because she's that annoying of a character. Hell, if she was killed, they shouldn't even bother finding the killer. He/She did everyone a favor.
Lastly, why are the spouses want Noah and Alison back? Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice and for some reason I still want you back. If I feel any pity for anyone it's definitely the spouses. I do not know why they want these cheaters, who are in love with each other. Why would they want to be in second in the cheaters' hearts, I will never know. Their vagina and dick can't be all that great.
Okay now that I finally got that all out of my chest, let's get to the actual episode. Noah is doing it big by sexing women left and right which leads him to get in trouble with his school because the janitor caught him doing it in a classroom. Naughty, naughty. He's sent to something similar to detention for teachers and decides to start writing his book. He finishes and apparently it's great. His older kids may hate him, but at least he has his book. Noah's wife finds out about Noah's penis being up and about walking into every woman he sees and about him knowing who Whitney's baby daddy is. Noah thinks his wife would use it in court, but she doesn't want a divorce at all. They plan to sue Scotty for statutory rape; however, Whitney claims to be in love with Scotty. Whitney runs away from home and takes shelter at the Lockharts. Alison calls Noah the next day and when he didn't answer, she leaves a text telling him his daughter is there. Alison's mother-in-law begs the Solloways to not sue, but mama-bear ain't havin' it. Scotty comes down asking if they got rid of Whitney yet and Noah overhears and starts charging at Scotty. The fight leads to the yard and Cole fires a warning with his gun. Noah needs to make a choice.
*Note I disliked how Noah turned over his wife while they had sex. It was so disconnect. It made feel like she was just another f*ck to him since he couldn't even look her in the eye. Also, I don't think Helen married her mother, I think she married her father. Everything about Noah resembles her father (author, cheater). I don't know how she sees her mother.
Alison has been staying with her spiritual mother, but has to go back to deal with the house. We finally see the infamous Phoebe (owner of the sex pad), we kept hearing about. Alison tells her about her affair. The next day, Alison sees her sister-in-law and girl was not happy to see her. S-i-l tells Alison that they lost the house the week before and she's still not over Alison walking out on the family. Alison swings by her house and husband is there and has kept himself busy by fixing up the place. Husband thinks Alison is coming back to talk, but then figures out she just came back to sell their house. Alison gets the idea to sell the house to him. Again, another spouse wants to get back together. Alison doesn't want work on their marriage anymore. Alison asks her husband why he wasn't watching their son. It escalated after that, but were interrupted by s-i-l telling them Whitney was at m-i-l's house. Everyone finds out about Scotty and Whitney. Alison is talked into calling Noah to come pick up his daughter. Noah and his wife come to the house and before the m-i-l comes downstairs to talk to them about the statutory rape, Alison's husband pulls out his gun and basically points at everyone in the room, including himself but Alison talks him out of committing suicide. Noah is again left with a choice to leave with his family or console Alison and he chooses Alison.
The detective is a lying bastard, but I do have to say he is smart. He played Noah into seeing the tow trucker so Noah would be tempted to talk to him. Noah ends up bribing the trucker, buying his silence, but what Noah doesn't know is man was already working for the detective and was recording their conversation the whole time. We still don't know who still Scotty and I honestly don't really care since Scotty is an asshole, but whatever. Now if it was Whitney, then I would seriously want to know just so I know who instantly became my favorite character. We do finally find out for sure that Noah and Alison are together in the future. They are rich and have a daughter named Julianne. They are both happy and successful since both of their schedules were marked busy. Too bad Noah was taken away by the police for the murder of Scotty, but did you really think it was going to end happily? I hope not. But in all seriousness, if this show would have ended after 1 season, I would have been pissed by this ending.
I hope they fix the problems that I mentioned before, but keep the same structure to present the story. Maybe they can even switch it up and have their spouses tell the story from their perspective because like I said before, the affair isn't what interests me. It's what happens outside the affair that I'm interested in (or the effect of an affair). It was weird that Noah didn't respond to her "Do you believe me?" He just stared at her. WTF, man!?
If anyone won for their perspective, it has to be Alison because at least in her version we got to see Noah make a choice, but then again maybe the writers wanted to make us wait for the ending to find out. However, hers was more emotional so she wins regardless for me.
I'm still questioning if I should continue to watch the show. It's not boring (okay maybe it was a bit slow in the beginning to me) and it has grown on me, but it's still not must see. I'll probably decide next year (which is not that far away, hours actually) on what I should do.
P.S. I really, really, really hate Whitney ;-)